hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
