You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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