at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize