look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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