Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
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