And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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