just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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