i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
