and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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