I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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