I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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