the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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