she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
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