ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
