we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
