you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
