That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
