Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I'm jealous of your bromance
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
