I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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