I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
