She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
