if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Pappa wants mamma naked
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
