Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Randomize
