i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
