omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
