Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
