just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
