Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
