she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize