I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
third nipple confirmed
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
