Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
