This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
