Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
you inspire me to be a worse person
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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