im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
