No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
