Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
