smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
i think i have two assholes
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
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