The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
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Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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