U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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