I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
