Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
