one might say we're banned from that church
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
