the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
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we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
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I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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