But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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