You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Panties = found
Randomize
