i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
