i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize
