Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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