im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
