Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
